Saturday

Point - Take off all your clothes
- Nelly

I was like, good gracious, ass is bodacious
I'm flirtacious, tryin' to show patience
I've been lookin' for the right time to shoot my steeze (you know)
Waitin' for the right time to flash them keys
I'm leavin, please believin'
Me and the rest of my heathens
Check it, got a lock out the top of the four seasons
Penthouse, rooftop, birds are feedin'
No deceivin', nothin' up my sleeve, an' no teasin'
I need you to get up up on the dance floor
Give that man what he askin' for
'Cos I feel like bustin' loose and I feel like touchin' you
Uh uh can't nobody stop the juice so baby tell me what's the use

It's gettin' hot in here
So take off all your clothes
Oh it's gettin' hot in here
So take off all your clothes
Yeah yeah come on



Counterpoint - We don't have to take our clothes off to have a good time
- Jermaine Stewart

Not a word from your lips
You just took for granted that I want to skinny dip.
A quick hit, that's your game.
But I'm not a piece of meat, still you like my brain.
Night is young, so are we.
Let's get to know each other better, slow & easily.
Take my hand, let's hit the floor.
Shake our bodies to the music.
Maybe then you'll score.

So come on baby, won't you show some class
Why you want to move so fast.
We don't have to take our clothes off
To have a good time
Oh no
We could dance & party all night
And drink some cherry wine
Uh huh
We don't have to take our clothes off
To have a good time
Oh no
We could dance & party all night (all night)
And drink some cherry wine
Uh huh

Friday

Hey all right! The Buy Bush a PS2 campaign has achieved its purpose! Thanks to someone posting Evil Ninja's campaign on Fark, it's reached it's goal of $270 almost entirely in one day! I can't wait to see what kind of response the White House gives. Probably something along the lines of "Thanks, but I've already got one."

(Actually, I'm willing to bet that Bush is more of a GameCube person.)

Alrighty, more of the fun fund has been squandered away on trivial, meaningless falderal that will hopefully inspire more content for this site. Expect soon a dissertation on the merits and drawbacks of the violent-sounding Fruit Rippers, as well as whatever Matt from X-E decides to send me in the X-E mystery box which I purchased yesterday.

I'm on a real spending spree this month, mostly brought on by the fact that I finally realized the significance of the "work = money" formula (If I work all the fucking time, I must have more money than usual.), and decided I could stop living like I was a starving unemployed college graduate and buy stuff I want when I actually stopped to look at my checking account. I may even start a savings account! I'm living the American dream over here! Plus, the Christmas season will soon be upon us, which means that some bitchin' games are being released.

I picked up Tony Hawk 4, which will hopefully rekindle my faith in the Tony Hawk's pro-skater franchise after THPS 3 turned out to be somewhat disappointing. I mean, it was great and all, but was less than I expected. I also picked up the new Contra: Shattered Soldier, which relives the glory pre=PlayStation days of Contra by being kickass and harder than hell. It is a worthy challenge for my mad skillz, and not only that, it's a worthy challege with giant water-skiing robots.

Also I bought a used Genesis off of a co-worker, which should prove entertaining. I've only got Mortal Kombat 3 and Road Rash, but I will certainly try to obtain some more quality titles in the near future. Oh if I could just find Contra: Hard Corps, my life would be rendered sweet.

Thursday

Well, I dislike jumping on the meme-wagon as much as the next guy, or rather, more than the next guy, but I think I'm in like.. the 3rd or fourth tier, so it's still kinda cool: Googlism via Fury

And I quote:

ken moodie is in charge of our area

That's right, snizznitches, all your base are bel... oops, I was mixing my memes there, sorry. Well, that's the only result I got, Typing in just "Kenneth" offers up a huge bizarre list of things he is, such as "kenneth is the hapless cottage owner", "kenneth is dumbfounded at the beauty of the moment", and "kenneth is an excellent starting point in the nation's vivid past", but I like "kenneth is best".

How eerily accurate.

Police have arrested two men, a 42-year-old army veteran and his 17-year-old alleged stepson, as suspects in the sniper killings. Well, I hope they got the right guys:

The good news: Well, if these are the right guys, that's good news of course, but I'm glad it's not a disaffected suburban teen who played too many video games.

The bad news: He's a Muslim. Now folks everywhere are going to start railing on all Muslims again.

The very bad news: Although the army trained the older guy, he wasn't trained as a sniper. Meaning that someone with no real sniper training can obtain a high-powered rifle which makes it easy to kill people while remaining hidden. I fear that real, organized terrorists will learn that they don't need to hijack an entire planeload of people to hold a portion of the strongest nation on Earth in terror for weeks on end. The way in which the media was involved really demonstrated that our own system of sending out information is the best weapon to use against us.

Any sort of methodical and periodic killing of people on such a small, simple scale would allow a single terrorist to publish news releases ("Show this video of the horrors America is visiting upon my people on all major networks or another will die tonight."), make demands and give a large portion of the nation's populace not only a dose of fear, but weaken their faith in law enforcement and in their own government's ability to protect them. The hijacking attacks were horrible, killed large quantities of people, shut down our flight system for a brief period of time, and made a nation afraid to fly. Only 14 people were shot in these attacks, but it was one at a time, over the course of weeks, and the people were just doing regular, everyday things. That's a very effective and efficient way to terrorize people.

Chances are good that something like what happened on September 11th of last year won't happen again, but the length of time that these guys managed to elude police, being a teenager and a sociopathic braggart, may serve as a lesson to others. Imagine what one or more trained operatives, familiar with their weaponry and evasion tactics, and not concerned with their own egos, could accomplish.

I stand corrected. The California DMV web site actually will tell you if your chosen vanity plate had already been taken. Sadly, because of this I have learned that "VEHICLE", "STOLEN", "NORADIO", "GO AWAY", "(HAND)MANOS", and the "(HAND)JOB" plate shown below are all taken.

"BEEF (HEART)S" is still available, though.
(Thanks to Jess for the correction.)

Tuesday


Customized license-plate factoids:

Did you know?
  • In California, you can only put the number "69" on your license plate if you have a 1969-year vehicle.

  • 8% of all car accidents are caused by drivers distracted by trying to decipher cryptic customized license plates.

  • Linguistically speaking, customized license plates, 1337-speak, and modern pop-song titles all share the common ancestor of the telegram.

  • If you request a customized license plate describing the model or make of your car, you are stupid.

  • The only customized license plates I've ever seen that were good were "GRR ARGH" and "BLURF"

  • Florida has a "Choose Life" specialty plate, but none for "Pro-Choice"?

  • Florida also has a "Challenger" specialty plate, which shows the Challenger in orbit. Uhhh... not to pick nits or anything...

  • Maine's DMV web site lets you check to see if a certain plate number is available or not.

  • That's really cool.

  • I wish you could do that with the California DMV.

  • It's time for lunch.

Monday

I wonder if the Baha men ever discovered who let their dogs out?

These better be the guys. If this fucking trigger happy asshole is still out there come October 31st and ruins Halloween for all those kids in the area, the Virginia police shuld just give in and call Morgan Freeman.

This must be a strange dilemma for all the cops on the case out there. One the one hand, I'm sure they don't want him to shoot anybody else, but on the other hand, with each successive attack, they get closer to finding the culprit.

You know, if this buttmunch really wanted to make headlines and prove what a great shot he was, he should've packed up over to Iraq and put a slug in Saddam's head.

The powdered coffee creamer in the employee break room here looks remarkably like Kraft parmesan cheese...

...I can't wait until April.

Sunday



Photo taken in Tokyo during trip to Japan, depicting the two greatest threats to the land of the rising sun caught in one place.

At McDonald's in Japan, the menu still lists "Smile .... 0 Yen" at the bottom, and the only thing I recall being able to get there that wasn't available here was a chicken patty with cabbage between two rice cakes. I was really hoping for a squid-burger or seahorse nuggets or something more exotic.