Well, geee. Let's find out, shall we?

*clench* *grind* *clench*........

So we were at Vegas right? And we had just come back from the Gameworks where we got our asses handed to us by the 70-foot indoor climbing wall. All except for JayDee, who actualy made it to the top becuase he's like... I dunno... high on PCP or something. Paris and I only made it ten feet up, while 9-year-olds were passing us like they were frickin' Spiderman. If you aks me, they just haven't learned a healthy fear of hieghts yet. Also, we had just gotten back from seeing Vertical Limit (Which, btw, comes out much funnier when I mistype it as Cervical Limit, which I seriously just did) and that movie kicked our asses so much, we only had ten feet left of ass-kick left in us.

So the others had gone to see girly girl nancy sissy stupid film, Miss Congeniality and had already eaten by the time we got back to the hotel, and we went down to the 24-hour 50's-themed diner to get our grub on. JayDee and I had normal unhealthy crappy diner food, but Paris, noooo.... he's got something to make up for after that 10-fot showing at the rock wall, he orders the BIG DADDY. Now, I'm not one to capitalize without proper justification. Ladies and Gentlemen, check this out:

It was so big that most of it was out of the frame. I tried to capture the whole thing with Paris and JayDee in there registering their shock at this mighty burger, but to little avail. So, in case you can't tell this burger was essentially every other burger on the menu jammed into one bun. 4 patties, 4 layers of cheese, bacon, onions, mushrooms, i think. I mean DAMN. Now, this burger made Paris its bitch. I mean, he's a tough guy, he can take a Jack in the Crack Bacon Double Cheeseburger in one sitting and not puke. He can go to a joint and say, "Gimme the greasiest, most nasty, disgusting burger you got!" in absolute seriousness. But he got two bites away from polishing this baby off. He has forever earned my respect.

"The Big Daddy - It will make you its bitch."
P.S. I don't know what's up with the guy behind them, I think he's about to moon us.

Some unoffical features of Deluxe Nightwing Beast Machine:

1) His arm is poseable enough to pass in front of his face, then when you spread the wing on his arm, it looks like a cape! Wave him at your friends and say, "Bluh, I vant to suck your blood!" in a bulgarian accent for full effect.

2) Part of his transformation form robot to beast mode involves his crotch splitting apart to reveal a hideous bat-head. This is extremely disturbing if you're not expecting it, try it on your stoned friends.


Fun lyric substition time!

Chemical Brothers - Block Rockin Beats - "Back with another one of those buttfuckin' beats!"

Bob Marley - Jammin' - "We jammin', I wanna jam it in you."

Wilson PIckett - Mustang Sally - "Mustache Sally, girl you better shave your mustache now."

Siouxsie and The Banshees - Kiss Them For Me - "Kiss the furby, I may be delayed."

Underworld - Dark and Long - "My vagina, my vagina, my vagina"




"So, we'll be announcing layoffs tomorrow. Until then, here's 29 more pages to comp. And Ken, it'd be good if you could have this done today or tomorrow morning."

It's like breakup sex, one more screw before the axe falls.

...except breakup sex is good.

If San Francisco doesn't already have a city motto, might I make a suggestion?

"Welcome to San Francisco, No Left Turn."

I had a strange dream lat night that I was at a party, and I was meeting characters from B-list fighting games I've played like Eternal Champions or World Heroes, and I felt embarrassed because I couldn't remember their names. I'm not even kidding, these are the kind of dreams that I have.